calcitrants | IC INBOX [ERKU]

[ there's a couple minutes of silence -- he doesn't mean to be terse, not to mcgillis, and the man's perceptiveness is a reminder that he's presently tired of being on his own right now. maybe -- ]

I'm sorry. It has just been a very long night. If it is not too much of an imposition, would you be able to come over?

[ then, the next text, a welcome distraction: ]

Were the frittatas oven-made or over the stove?

[Denied. McGillis has scented blood; nothing else matters now.]

What happened?

[ ...gods but he hates this ridiculously handsome shark (no, he doesn't). ]

I'd rather tell you in person. The whiskey on this island still tastes horrible.

Would you prefer wine?

[Y'know. For all the whining you are clearly about to do.]

I finished a bottle. You might as well bring another.

What did you do to the frittatas?

[ yeah he's not letting that go either. ]

Unspeakable things.

[Get it? It's funny because... actually, never mind, bad time for a joke.]

Do I need to bring anything else?

Did you just make a joke?

[ that was kind of -- cute. ]

Yes. All 6'6 of you.

Did you make the frittatas over high heat instead of medium?

I need to teach you how to deflect better.

[It's the last message McGillis sends before he hurries on his way. Even if Ignis wasn't collapsed in despair, he recognizes that he needed the company—more than he was willing to admit.]

[ ignis will open the door for him once he turns up, his shirt unbuttoned and eyes suspiciously red-rimmed and tired. despite the sassy tone in the text, mcgillis is right. he needs him, specifically, for so many reasons. ]

Come in. I'm sorry, I don't have anything on the stove just yet. I could make frittatas with you a little later.

[McGillis pulls up on a perky scooter as opposed to a chirpy chocobo. It is very stylish and he will hear no arguments to the contrary.

Dressed in a simple shirt and slacks, he has brought a gift—or rather a tribute—in the form of a bottle of vintage wine. Presenting it to Ignis, he shakes his head at the offer and steps on inside. Toeing off his shoes and turning swiftly on his host, suddenly ditching his usual manners in favor of a pretty blunt callout.]

Stop apologizing and stop talking about food.

[He knows it will be a struggle, Ignis, but you're going to have to try.]

Tell me everything.

...Can we talk about the... vehicle you rode in on, then?

[ because having a 6'6 giant of a handsome, classy man on a violently pink scooter is just such a hilariously adorkable image that ignis is distracted from his woes for a few moments. forget ignis' problems, this scooter is the one that can definitely signal ships at sea.

and while ignis wouldn't usually comment on things like these when it comes to guests, he and mcgillis have gone far beyond that, as evidenced by that straightforward callout. the idea of mcgillis fareed on a scooter is so baffling that he can't help a follow-up question as he takes the wine. vintage, excellent. ]

Did you... [ lose a bet? ] ...where's Avis?

[ although to be honest, mcgillis is hot enough to carry off riding that disastrous thing. ]

It was the fastest way to get here.

[And, in theory, a lot less of a distraction than Avis, but...

Well, so much for that. But he will definitely utilize his size advantage to seize Ignis by the arm and bully him into the kitchen. The kitchen where, at least for now, no cooking was to take place. Zero. None. He deposits Ignis at the table like a sack of potatoes and fishes for the wine opener and a set of glasses.]

Start talking.

[They were getting to the comforting part. Really. Honestly.]

[ ...he came here the quickest he could on that scooter instead of avis. where people can see. ignis is quiet, letting the implication of that sink in -- and it's why he doesn't resist when he's practically dragged and hauled into the kitchen for him to to sit. and wait.

but ignis has other ideas. quietly moved by what he doesn't say, understanding that underneath that blunt straightforwardness is a man who actually cares. no flowery words, nothing; only action.

he rises from his seat, then, coming up to him from behind to wrap his arms around the man's waist, holding him tight and burying his face into the broad span of his back.

even at his most bleak, as it appears, mcgillis is here and right now, ignis feels actually comforted. he exhales a sigh, quiet and genuine. ]

...Thank you.

[McGillis turns and fixes Ignis with a concerned expression. Not just for those vague circumstances but because he still had yet to learn that all important lesson of don't deflect. Except he was guilty of the same so he can't properly take him to task over it, simply sighing at the sight of him so dejected. And he absolutely was, all but obvious to his eyes.]

I really don't want to hear that right now.

[Pouring a generous glass for Ignis then himself, he trails back to the table.]

I don't want to hear anything but the truth. So tell it.

I found out who it was who really killed the king. And everyone else in the Citadel, during the signing of the peace accords.

[ ignis speaks up after a few moments, following him back to the table and taking the glass once it's filled, staring down at its depths. ]

The king was -- [ he sighs. ] -- I saw him as a surrogate father, ever since I was a child. [ and ignis never had a chance to grieve. not for the king, or his home, burned out and destroyed, or the deaths of all the loved ones they'd left behind. ] My parents both passed, save for an uncle. And so he was kind to me and made sure I was cared for when I entered his service.

[ he takes a long drag of the wine, as if it could wash away the bitterness. he closes his eyes, brooding over the horrific events, everything that nyx has told him. but it helps, to have someone who listens -- to have someone he doesn't have to immediately manage the emotions of. ] If Noctis knows this, it will crush him.

[...oh. So it was one of those stories.

One of those burdens, that of forbidden knowledge. And he can't quite relate, at least not in a familial regard; Ignis already knows that he was a street urchin. But he does know what it means to learn a terrible truth, to shield it from others. It was what he based his entire grand plan upon: that Gundam Bael was alive and this life must be used to reform a rotten world.

But this was a truth that had already been resolved. All that was left to do... no, all he could do was either withhold it or tell it.]

Are you so sure about that?

[Sipping at his wine, McGillis stares Ignis down with intensity.]

It may upset him, but if you hide it and he finds out first... what then?

The last thing Noctis said to the traitor was that he would leave his father in his care.

[ ignis says bluntly. something about mcgillis' reaction tells him that he understands, at least, even if he was brought up under vastly different circumstances. ]

As it turns out, the captain of the king's most trusted service was the one who murdered him.

[ imagine that. ignis finishes the last of the wine -- he's inebriated from the previous bottle, but this one just makes him feel numb. ]

We trusted him to protect His Majesty. All of us. Instead, he turned him over to the enemy. If only I was smart enough to find out sooner, instead of leaving with the others.

[McGillis tops Ignis off but monitors his state with care. He was here to get him drunk, not have him slumping onto the floor or vomiting into his own glass. Carefully absorbing this additional information, his initial assessment doesn't change at all—in fact he only doubles down on it.]

If these events have already happened, reality cannot be changed. And if it cannot be changed...

[It's going to sound harsh. But Ignis must have known that, must have already guessed McGillis would take this approach.]

You're not protecting him, Ignis. You're coddling yourself and using it as an excuse to keep your charge in the dark.

[ he knows that. he's known that all along -- but it still hits different when mcgillis lays it out for him the way he knows he would. the man thinks like him, and in this moment he doesn't let sentiment get in the way.

mcgillis' assessment is spot-on and incisive, but ignis remembers the rage and grief noctis displayed at the tombs in the beginning, the heart-rending pain in his voice, and he knows this will be worse.

instead, he toys with his glass again, shaking his head. ]

You're right. I would've said the same thing to you if our positions were reversed. [ he pauses, then looks at him. ] Would you have preferred to know, even if there's nothing you can do about it?

[McGillis was here to lay it out but he wasn't here to be cruel. Reaching for Ignis, he lays a gentle hand on his wrist, a quiet statement of support.]

Absolutely.

[And at least by his own measure, nothing more need be said on the matter.]

[ the gesture of comfort and support is appreciated, and ignis takes a breath. ]

...Thank you. [ his hand comes to rest over mcgillis', too, and he exhales a soft sigh. ] I'm sorry. I'm not ever like this.

[ and maybe that's the problem, because ignis has always been so busy minding everyone else and putting his own feelings about things on the backburner. after all, noctis is not the only one who's lost the people he loves deeply. but anyway. tiredly, he murmurs. ] I just needed some time to get it together on my own. Before the others find out.

[ because ignis has to be that steady foundation for noctis, for gladio; he has to be the one to help them to process the depth of that betrayal, the wounds it will reopen. and ignis -- well. ignis needs mcgillis. ]

[McGillis chides him, though only with the best intentions.]

You're allowed to feel things, Ignis.

[Which should have gone without saying, which he might not have believed himself... but he had come a long way since his unceremonious arrival to Erku months and months ago. More like a lifetime ago, or at least so far in the past he could no longer pinpoint what happened and when. So maybe McGillis Fareed was finally paying it forward to someone else, at long last.

Threading their fingers together, McGillis finishes his glass and allows Ignis a moment to gather himself. On your own time, friend.]

I have people that I have to take care of.

[ he says quietly, but he finishes his glass before rising. he knows it's not much of an explanation, but it's how he's always operated until now -- and he knows mcgillis knows, this, too; after all, the man's been trying to make him put himself first from time to time.

and ignis appreciates it, just as he appreciates him. curling his fingers together with his before he rises, he gently tugs on his hand. he's grateful, all things considered, because he knows he's got plenty of problems of his own to sort out, and trusting mcgillis feels like he'd taken a leap of faith that's paid off.

he pauses for a moment, then muses dryly. ]

It's almost funny. The two times that I've been at my lowest and needed someone -- both times, you're there.

[Ignis has also likely learned by now that it didn't take much to prod McGillis do this or that thing, not when he was already hopelessly fond; as the other man pulls at his hand, he follows along and steps closely and comfortably into his space. Sliding a hand behind his neck—a vulnerable place on any human being—he leans down to touch their foreheads together.

This beautiful man could absolutely, positively kick his ass and he pays subtle deference to that now.]

Nothing funny about it. Just a happy coincidence, I suppose.

[ ignis is usually sensitive about that gesture and isn't prone to let anyone simply curl their hand over the back of his neck -- there are a hundred different ways things can go wrong, but with mcgillis, he eases into it and leans into him.

this is different, and he raises their joined hands to press a kiss to the back of mcgillis' as he meets his eyes. learning to be vulnerable around people is still new to him, and he draws closer to nose at his cheek, his own cheeks flushed with the alcohol and the delicious vintage wine on his breath. ]

I'm glad you're here.

[ he's intoxicated and honest enough to admit it, because even ignis can't be everything to everyone at once, even if he does his level best. in mcgillis' company, he feels most like himself, divested from his duties and yet still capable of a thorough ass-kicking. a few hours just to deal with his own grief, and he'll be right as rain. ]

Although it is a little galling that you have to see me like this.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

action;

action;

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject